Getting away is a skill

For some folks, namely me, getting away is not a natural ability. It takes effort.

I see now that the trip we took recently was way, way overdue. I was basically paralyzed to even plan the trip beyond a rough route and the first few stops. Thankfully my wife took over and organized stuff before we got too far, but clearly I shouldn’t have let myself get to that state before going.

You’d think vacation would be easy to remember to take, but in my case if I miss the window it gets over-though, it becomes overwhelming, it doesn’t happen, and the downward spiral begins.

How do you make sure you get away often enough?

Sailor Boy Pilot Bread

As I mentioned in another post, I got a little obsessed with the idea of hard tack, and that led me to Sailor Boy Pilot Bread. This is a large dense cracker product beloved by the people of Alaska, and this is my review of it.

Unobtainium

These crackers are impossible to buy in Kentucky, but I suspect they’re hard to buy anywhere outside of Alaska. The manufacturer hasn’t responded to any emails, and the phone numbers I’ve been able to find are out of service. I’m guessing they just don’t have enough customer interaction to notice, or the several recent mergers/buyouts they seem to have been part of have left them busy with other stuff.

Fortunately I know someone in Alaska who generously sent me a box to try out. I worried – am I going to fall in love with these, and I’ll be bugging this poor person forever trying to get more?

A big, bland, crumbly cracker

Box says the company wants to hear from you, but provides no address/email/social media links.

They would love to hear from you, but don't tell you how to contact them.
They would love to hear from you, but don’t tell you how to contact them.

They are a smidge over 3.5” in diameter. A bit harder than a normal cracker, denser, just as flaky. The flavor is cracker. No salt. The kind of cracker that packs itself into mortar in every tooth crevice you have.

Last month I was sick, couldn’t keep anything down, and had to have something in my gut for a pain pill. These crackers worked just fine.

They are crumbly and are prone to shatter into bits. The crumbly aspect is kind of ironic given the threat of bears & leaving food out, etc. in bear country which as we all know, Alaska is. It’s probably no more crumbly than a regular saltine, but it’s like 10 times as big so it seem worse.

It’s easy to see this cracker being a carrier for just about anything including a not-to-small cooked hamburger patty. They’re big. So whatever you’re spreading had better be up to it. Boursin cheese has an entirely different economic impact when you’re putting it on one of these.

The kind soul who sent me a box responded “I don’t think you’ve ever had hard tack” when I questioned the wisdom of sending the crackers through the mail. Well, they are pretty sturdy, but they are a long way from being as hard as hard tack. While mine faired pretty well in shipping, Amazon reviews suggest most don’t – although they’re not available on Amazon anymore.

Road Test

We took them on a 2-week road trip to some national parks because surely that would be the ideal time for them. But no, they came home untouched. To be fair most of what we brought from home came home untouched. For whatever reason, we just didn’t use the pantry stuff we had, instead eating a lot of deli meat and pasta and tacos. Heck, even some of the chips we bought on the way ended up making it home. But I digress.

Independent snack food?

The lack of salt makes them a bit unappetizing by themselves and they really need a spread or something else to get your saliva glands going. I could see how the lack of salt could be why they work well as a bread substitute, but only for people who don’t have actual bread. Of course, why else would they need a bread substitute?

Their size puts them into a different category than regular crackers, more like sandwich size meals. So snacking probably means one or at most two crackers. You needn’t worry about having an open package nearby and absent-mindedly eating them all. If you got past two you’re probably need a nap. Snackccidents with these are unlikely.

Eating as the Alaskans do

Ok so if they’re not a snack cracker, what do you do with them?

According to web searches, you put stuff on them. I tried tuna salad (ok, really just tuna fish with mayo) on one and it was good. The cracker doesn’t bring much to the party but substrate and calories (they’re 90Kcal each) so really anything would work.

People make pizza using them, tostadas and lots of other things. As Littlehousebigalaska.com puts it “You can put anything ON it, and it just works.” They even mentioned toasting & buttering them, along with crumbling them into soup or stew. I’m thinking some cinnamon sugar, butter, and a brief visit to the oven/broiler to get caramelized could be quite nice.

I haven’t tried most of these, but I plan to. More to follow!

Gazelle T8 tent vs. Badlands thunderstorm

We bought the T8 tent to take on a 2-week road trip out west. We’ve owned a T4 & a Clam which have worked well for us, and wanted something with the same features only bigger. Namely very fast setup, windows off the ground, and enough pockets.

While the tent is nominally the same in terms of features, the design did not scale well and it has not proven to be good value for us.

There was a thunderstorm while we were camped in the badlands and it had its way with this tent.

The storm started with rain, and then the wind picked up rapidly. The rain was no problem, and I wasn’t concerned about the wind at first because plastic tents are loud by nature and tend to make weather sound much worse than it is.

First the hubs started popping back in. I’d staked out the two hubs that were facing the wind because there was a stiff breeze earlier in the day. I know from experience with the Clam and T4 that the hubs will pop back in if the wind gets strong enough. I didn’t stake all of them and as the wind increased it blew in the side hubs, including one that had been staked, and blew down the roof hubs, which required all 5 of us to hold the sides out and the roofs up. This made it difficult to go out and fix the fly that was making a lot of noise and clearly needed attention.

The fly attaches with two short elastic sections, four short poles at the corners, and then there are two elastic cord tie-outs on each of the large side flaps. The fly is the Achilles heel of the tent.

The elastic cord tie-outs on the side flaps are not enough, and I’d planned to replace them with paracord. So once the kids calmed down enough I got out and started replacing the elastics with paracord, but that didn’t help much. There’s just too much flappy fabric, and looking back I’d have been better off rolling them up.

The elastic straps that hold the fly on at the ends broke, in one case the hook broke, and in the other the entire strap was gone. Amazingly, so was the eyelet, which had nothing attached to it. The elastic straps failing, combined with the roof hub collapsing, allowed the wind to get under the fly and soon it was gone and that was game over because now rain was pouring into the tent. We gathered everything that couldn’t be dried out later and bailed to the cars and ultimately a hotel.

The next morning we came back, and this was the result:

Four of the 6 stake tabs detached.

This is not surprising given they’re held on with just a single line of stitching along a hem, instead of being a bit longer and being stitched to the heavy webbing just inside of the hem.

One of the ends where there used to be a short strap to hold the fly on, and an eyelet, both now gone. The hook on the other end of the fly broke.

The four short poles that hold the corners of the fly popped off when the roof collapsed, and once out were whipping around and damaged the tent, we noticed this later at another campground.

One of the metal ferrules on the end of the fly poles also broke, and another came off but we found it later. We could fit the fiberglass pole into the socket without the ferrule but only until the fiberglass pole started to fray at the end during a later setup.

I sewed the stake tabs back on using a Speedy Stitcher, careful to sew into meatier material, and we used paracord to tie the fly at the ends from then on, and used paracord to tie the flaps down. As it happened, the next night was calm and the rest of the sites we camped at on the trip were much more protected and we got much luckier with the weather. Once the fiberglass poles started to fray and couldn’t be put into the socket to hold the fly on, we stopped using the tent altogether.

While the tent does set up very fast, and has lots of room and nice organizational features, I probably would not use it for a trip like this again. It’s just not made strongly enough and the design is too complicated and has too many flaws. In a local or very protected campground it is a convenient choice.

If I had to use this tent again in winds more than about 20mph or so, I would stake out all of the hubs, put poles under the roof hubs, and either roll the side flaps of the fly and stake the center tabs, or stake the flaps straight down somehow. Oh, and reattach the stake tabs to the heavier material that is very close by. At that point it’s going to look like Guliver tied down by the Lilliputians and be as much work & stakes as a Springbar or traditional dome tent with multiple poles, but with less space because of the interior poles holding up the roof. Since those poles will be the key to keeping the fly on, they’re not going to be optional.

We’ve contacted Gazelle about the issues and after supplying a serial number and proof of purchase are waiting to hear back from them.

Update: They responded that they do not consider storm damage to be a warrantable defect, but sent us a replacement rain fly.